Accidents (MC, Fdom, preg, humor) 
Homer Vargas 
Vargas111@yahoo.com

[Acknowledgement of inspiration to CDE and John Feer]

I just cannot understand why Diana keeps having so many "accidents" since she
has become my wife.  Before, she never ...  I guess that's confusing, so let me
start over.

My name is Steve and I'm a retired military officer.  For copyright reasons, I
can't tell you my last name or Diana's maiden name.  I had been in love with
Diana for many years before she finally and suddenly accepted my long-standing
proposal of marriage.  Besides the length of our courtship, starting back during
WWII, there is nothing too unusual about that.  What's unusual is that Diana,
although I didn't know that was her name at the time, is a superheroine.  I
can't be too explicit, except to say she's a woman who is wonderfully stacked,
wears a skimpy star-spangled costume, and goes around saving the world.

Well, I actually do a good bit of the saving, but she always gets the credit.  I
think the TV crews just love to zoom in on those DD boobs as she hands the mad
scientist, alien monster, or political terrorist over to the authorities.  Take
the caper just before we married.

Something, a meteorite supposedly, had crashed into a remote ranching area out
west.  Soon reports began arriving of women in the area being molested by some
sort of creature.  International Defense Intelligence Agency sent me and the
superheroine I loved to investigate.  I interviewed the women while she scoured
the area for the spaceship, for that's what IDIA now thought it was.

The stories I got from the women were all similarly vague.  A creature,
described always as large, dark, and humanoid, attacked women when they were
alone.  The descriptions of the creature were all pretty disgusting - snouts,
multiple limbs - but the women didn't seen upset about the attack.  None could
remember much, but they got a kind of happy, dreamy look on their faces when
they tried.  Stranger still, several of the husbands pulled me aside later to
tell me that since the "attack" their wives had been acting quite odd, not that
they were complaining.  Let me transcribe my notes of one typical statement:

"It's great, buddy!  Suddenly Mary Jane wants to do it all the f_ _ _ ing time,
I mean like EVERY DAY.  And I used to have to threaten to let my mother move in
with us to get a BJ; now she's turned into an addict.  She loves to kneel there
in front of me and suck on my rod.  I swear, I think she orgasms just from
having it in her mouth, although she sometimes says it's too bad I have only
one!  She doesn't get tired, but she does get so worked up that she just has to
get f _ _ _ed.  She begs me for it.  And before she would never let me eat her;
now she can't get enough of that, either, except she gets so worked up and wants
me to ...  like I said."

"Hell, she wants sex so bad all the time I've been able to get her to act more
like a woman, like ditching all those goddamned pantyhose and ordering a bunch
of sexy stockings and bras from the mail-order catalogue.  And I've got her
actually wearing the sexy pajamas I've been buying her for Valentine's day and
anniversary since we married.  When we go out square dancin' she wears skirts
short enough to make my buddies envious, and around home, she just runs around
in scanties."

"But the best thing, and this was her idea, she says she's going let me knock
her up again, like I've been wantin' to ever since our youngest went off to
school.  From the first time we f_ _ _ ed after the attack, she didn't make me
wear a condom.  She's promised to quit her job at the bank and stay home raisin'
me a whole 'second family.'"

I just hoped the maternity ward in the little community hospital could handle
the business!

I finished the interviews in less than a day but Diana hadn't come back to the
Hotel, (separate rooms <sigh>), so I went looking for her.  I had a device that
homed in on her invisible plane and found it near the mouth of a cave.  Nearby I
saw the remains of the crashed alien spacecraft, cleverly disguised to look like
the remains of a weather balloon.  As I approached, I though I heard the sounds
of a struggle.  Entering the cave I saw Diana in combat with a large dark
humanoid opponent.  I smiled to see she had the best of him.  He was on his back
and Diana was trying to knock the breath out of him by banging her self up and
down on his abdomen, crying out, "Yes! Yes, you monster.  Like that."  The
delight on her face showed she was pleased with the way things were going.  I
noticed that in the struggle, her top had come off and I got my first peek at
those twin mountains I'd been dreaming about.

Unfortunately just at that moment, the creature gained the upper hand, somehow
being able to flip Diana over so that he was now on top.  I was now able to see
his advantage.  Besides two strong arms he had two tentacles growing from his
chest and he was using them to torment poor Diana's breasts.  Worse, I hadn't
noticed when he did it but he had gotten yet another tentacle in her, er,
feminine parts.  The pain must have been terrible for Diana was incoherent,
screaming, "Oh, no, not my tits!  Uuuuuh!  Great Hera you're big.  You're
splitting me in two.  AHHHH!"

I saw my poor Diana suffering terribly, but I could do nothing.  She was
flailing her head from side to side and moaning so that I couldn't get off a
clear shot.  Then the creature went rigid shuddered and threw himself down onto
Diana, letting out an ear-splitting roar.  Whatever he did must have hurt Diana,
too, for she screamed too and passed out.  The creature remained on her for a
few minutes and then crawled off, a huge satisfied smile on his disgusting face. 
I incinerated him instantly with a blast from my IADI-issue laser pistol.

Diana was still only half conscious when I got her back to the hotel and cleaned
off gob and gobs of a sticky blue goo that the monster had leaked all over her. 
There even seemed to be some in her er, feminine parts, because after cleaning
her up, more kept oozing out and running down her leg.  Strangely while she was
unconscious, she had a big smile on her face, maybe because she realized she was
safe with me.  Stranger still was her reaction when she regained consciousness
and I told her about killing the monster.  She must have still been in some kind
of shock, because she broke down, sobbing, "But he was so good, so big.  He was
the best!"  It was almost as if she had lost a lover.

She soon came to her senses, however, and several weeks later Diana, my
secretary, who had always been IDIA's contact with its resident superheroine,
had a message from her for me.  "She has surprise for you, if you'd like to meet
her at my house for a drink after work."  Since I knew Diana was a respectable
woman and nothing untoward would happen, I accepted.  When we arrived and closed
the door, Diana gave a little twirl and suddenly, there was the woman, the
superheroine I loved.  Giggling like a schoolgirl, Diana explained that she and
my superheroine heartthrob were one and the same woman.  "I'm the surprise." 
That was when she told me that after that last rescue, she had thought it over
and had decided to marry me, "And let you take care of me all the time,
darling."

I was so happy that I got a little carried away drinking wine and, I'm ashamed
to admit, we wound up having sex that night even though we were not married yet. 
At least I guess that's what happened.  The last I remember Diana and I were in
bed and she pulled down her star spangled tights and let me worship her, er,
feminine parts.  The next morning she told me I had been wonderful, but that we
mustn't do it again until the honeymoon.  I agreed that was the proper thing,
but I did wish I had been able to remember doing the improper thing for the
first time.

I'd barely moved in with her, a surprisingly large house for her salary as a
secretary, and started planning the wedding, when Diana had another surprise for
me.  "Darling, we're going to he hearing the pitter-patter-putter of little feet
around here!" she told me.  I was a little confused, wondering if it was
possible to make Diana pregnant on just one night when I couldn't even remember
"doing it."  But Diana was so happy, I had to be happy for her too.  I
remembered the night we made love the first time (I guess) she had told me she
wanted to have lots of little ones and that I'd better like being married to a
pregnant woman, because that's how she was going to stay.  I liked the idea, I
just never expected it to start so soon.

Diana still insisted that she should "save herself" (at least what was left) for
me until the wedding so we couldn't have sex, but that oral sex, at least me
licking her, er, feminine parts didn't count.  I pointed out that a recent US
President had said that blowjobs don't count as sex either, but Diana was
adamant that good girls didn't do that until after they were married. 
(Unfortunately, I later discovered she believes that decent wives don't do it
either, at least not with their husbands.)

I think this was about the time things really started to get weird.  My fiancée
was still very much the superheroine, flying off thither and yon, leaving me to
take care of the house and wedding arrangements.  But whereas before she was
always successful in her exploits, now she came staggering home defeated time
and again.  She admitted that when she faced a criminal, or terrorist, or alien
life form, more often than not, she wound up with some sort of male organ in
her.  She said that my being there to soothe and lick the spawn, or seed, or
ichor out of her poor battered, er, feminine parts with my tongue showed how
much I loved her and made her love me all the more.

Eventually, I began to suspect that the sexual abuse by her opponents wasn't
exactly involuntary.  "OK, it's the pregnancy, darling.  Just thinking about
having an offspring inside me makes me horny all the time.  As soon as some
villain pats my toosh or squeezes a tit or slides a finger or tentacle into my,
er, feminine parts, I just get so aroused, I have to let him have his way with
me.  For example the Octothorian I tried to capture last week.  I struggled as
hard as I could.  It was so terrible darling!  It has its disgusting tentacles
all over me, and I do mean all over me...."

It came out that her defeat at the hands, or assorted extremities, of these foes
even included giving the BJ's she denied me.  "I'm sorry, sweetheart, but when I
have a big drooling organ in my face I just have to suck it.  Seems I'm just so
weak when I'm around a powerful male of any species."

That did not make me feel too good, as Diana was not too weak around ME to keep
telling me to wait until after the wedding.  She did relent, however, and agree
to get me off with a hand job after I'd cleaned up her spawn, or seed, or
ichor-filled, er, feminine parts especially well.

Once she started to show, she did slow down and stopped accepting off-Earth
assignments to battle sic-fi monsters.  The constant defeats were doing nothing
for her reputation, anyway.  "Slowing down," on the other hand may not be quite
the right word.  She was involved in an undercover operation that she couldn't
tell even me anything about.  It consisted of her dressing in mufti, spikey
heels, tiny little miniskirts made shorter by her growing belly, and garish
makeup, and going out to bars and clubs several nights a week.  When I told her
she looked like a slut she just kissed me.  "Do you really think so, darling? 
Oh, thank you!"

Worse than the whorish clothing she had to wear on these assignments, was the
way she came home after them.  Her make-up would be runny, her skirt and blouse
torn and soiled, runs in her stockings and her hair disheveled.  She never came
home with panties, if she left with any.  Diana looked like she'd been f_ _ _ ed
six ways from Sunday, which I guessed she had been.  When I asked her if she
wasn't just going out to f_ _ _ guys for fun, she became really hurt.  "How can
you say that darling?  It's true I have a weakness for big macho types because
of the pregnancy, and I do sometimes get carried away and let several guys do me
one after the other, but YOU are the only man I love.  YOU are the man who is
going to marry me and who will be the daddy of all our children," she pouted. 
That did make me feel a little better, but I was still frustrated that so many
other men were getting to f_ _ _ her pretty, er, feminine parts and I wasn't.

The only good thing was that at least the f_ _ _-sauce I lapped out of her, er,
feminine parts tasted better now.  (Some of those aliens had REALLY foul-tasting
goo!)  Well, another good thing was that I had gotten so good at eating her, er
feminine parts, that she was letting me do it even when she wasn't full of some
villain's come.  Then, too, she was giving me hand jobs more regularly now and
seemed to be growing attached to my "cute little thingie."

As Diana's belly swelled, her "undercover" activities became more extreme;
sometimes she didn't come in for days, especially when she had to work Shriner
conventions and frat parties.  I asked her how it was she was able to f_ _ _ up
a storm with out loosing her superpowers but she explained that since she was
being overpowered by lust caused by the pregnancy, she wasn't really "giving
herself" to a man.  "They just take me," she giggled.

Still, I was concerned enough by her activities to insist on accompanying her to
one of her visits to her gynecologist.  The large bald head and leering eyes of
Dr Lexlu Thor (if I got his name right) didn't inspire confidence in me, but
Diana certainly liked him.  As soon as we got into his office she fairly flew
into his arms and got a very un-professional looking smooch.  He wasted no time
beginning his examination, grabbing her ass and beginning to palpate it even as
they kissed.

"So how's my big preggy girl?" he chuckled.  "Let's have a look at that
[feminine part]."  I had always thought that the patient undressed herself
privately and slipped on some kind of gown, but Dr. Thor was helping Diana shuck
her clothes as quickly as possible, as if he were eager to f _ _ _ her.  "Man o
man, Diana," he marveled and he ran a tape measure around her bare belly,
"Another two inches since last Tuesday.  I think you'd better be prepared for a
multiple.  And these jobbies!"  I though he was feeling of her breasts in a
rather too-friendly way as he shook his head in admiration.  "What are you up to
now, honey, EEE?  I guess you're ready for however many little mouths you have
to feed."

Laying her down on the examination table and putting her feet up in those
stirrups, he began an intense examination of Diana's breasts.  She didn't seem
to mind, for whenever he asked how it felt, she just moaned, "Oh, good, soooo
gooood!"  Proclaiming himself satisfied with the development of her breasts, Dr. 
Thor moved on to inspect "your business end."  I was rather alarmed at the size
of the instrument he began slowly to insert into Diana's, er, feminine parts. 
At first I thought she found it uncomfortable, for she was grunting and moaning,
but once it was all the way in, and the doctor began rhythmically moving it in
and out until she became used to it, she seemed to find it almost pleasant.  "Oh
yes, speculum me, speculum me!" she gasped.

I was even more surprised to see what came next.  Dr.  Thor was asking how well
and how often she was orgasming when he seemed to take seriously Diana's jocular
reply, "Why don't you 'come' see."  Apparently this optional part of the
examination consisted in the doctor inserting his fingers and then his tongue
into her, er, feminine parts, just as if he were giving her oral sex.  Her
reaction, repeated, screaming, spasming climaxes were similar, too.  I was a
little hurt; I though she could only come that hard with me, but I supposed that
he was a women's doctor and had the practice of doing this with several women
every day.  I'd never seen a gynecological examination before.

Eventually I was able to get in my questions whether it was wise for Diana to
continue going out at night, letting all kinds of strange men f_ _ _ her.  "It
certainly is NOT," he replied and looked down at Diana frowning.  My heart
skipped with joy.  "You know what I've told you, my dear, you MUST confine
yourself to the really big, well hung ones.  They're the ones who can can
stretch you an give you the massive orgasms that are so good for what's in
here."  He gave her naked tummy an affectionate pat.  Diana said she was trying,
but sometimes the best she could do was am eight or nine incher, although she
admitted they didn't do much for her.

Lexlu Thor looked pensively at her for a moment and wrote out a prescription. 
"I'm afraid, my dear that you've reached the stage where you need more reliable
stimulation than picking up guys hit or miss in bars and clubs, even inner city
ones.  The Stanley Orgasmatic is just what the doctor ordered, fifteen inches
and 750 watts of pure pleasure for your [feminine parts]!"

Then he asked her if she was ready for her weekly lubrication.  "Oh baby, am I!"
she responded.  As well as I can make out, Dr.  Thor believed that the, er,
feminine parts of a pregnant woman needed to be "lubricated" frequently with
male semen.  I'd never heard of that, but medical science is creating new
wonders every day, so I didn't object.  Diana' legs were still obscenely splayed
on the table and to my surprise, the doctor merely dropped his pants, walked up,
and thrust his male member directly into Diana's rather moist, er, feminine
parts.  Apparently she was eager to get the procedure over with rapidly because
she was imploring him, "Faster you b _ _ _ _ _ d, faster!  Lubricate me,
lubricate me!  Oh, s _ _ t yes, oil my gears!"

After the doctor delivered a rather astonishing volume of lubricant into
Diana's, er, feminine parts, I expected the procedure to be complete, but such
was not the case.  Lowering the table and releasing Diana's feet from the
stirrups, he had her turn onto her stomach and raise her ass so he could apply
lubricant from a different angle.  I had to admire the doctor's thoroughness and
wondered how many years of medical school were required to develop his
technique.  As he vigorously lubricated her again, it looked remarkably like
what some of my friends had called a "doggy f _ _ _."  I knew this was deeply
humiliating to Diana, notwithstanding her moans and grunts that might be taken
for enjoyment, and I realized just what sacrifices a mother was willing to make
for the good of her child.  When she came again, I cried for joy and pride,
thinking, "You're a wonder, woman."

Diana was almost comatose when we left the clinic.  I had to leave her
unattended as I received the astonishing bill:

Gluteal Examination	 $ 35.00 
Disrobing			 $ 45.00
Table prep			 $ 25.00
Abdominal cadaster	 $ 75.00 
Breast examination 
  ($15.00/cup size 
  9 x 2 x $15)			$270.00 
Observation by SO		$100.00 
Standard lubrication	$100.00 
Underbody lubrication	$150.00  
Total	                $800.00

It certainly was a detailed bill, if on the high side, but I didn't argue, being
in a hurry to get Diana home.  I knew that after a session like this afternoon,
I would have a big job of soothing on my hands, or rather, all over my face.

I have to say that Stanley Orgasmatic was a godsend! The undercover assignments
practically disappeared as Diana became too busy with her new friend.  She still
liked me to wake her up with a tongue in her, er feminine parts, but as soon as
I leave to make breakfast, I notice the lights dim when Diana poweres up that
monster for the first session of the day.  I've had to install three-phase
wiring for our bedroom as a safety precaution.

The rest of the pregnancy proceeded tranquilly.  Diana ate -- Lord how she ate
-- and came and slept.  God she looked beautiful in that over-stretched lycra
costume, the panties soaked with her, er, feminine parts-juice, peacefully
zonked after a multi-orgasmic encounter with Stanley.  She must have put on
50-60 lbs. and I was hoping that she would keep most of the gain in bust and
hips.

Diana was about seven months gone when we finally got the wedding arranged.  Dr.
Thor gave the bride away.  Diana looked so gorgeous as she waddled down the
aisle on Lexlu Thor 's arm.  They say all brides are beautiful and that all
pregnant women glow.  Diana's beauty was incandescent!

The honeymoon, on the other hand, left a lot to be desired, from my point of
view.  Diana was very sorry, but at that late stage in her pregnancy she just
didn't feel like doing it with me.  I could have understood that, but she DID
feel like doing it with the resort's bell boys, lifeguards, and assorted beach
bums.  The only saving grace was that she didn't let them see her in costume. 
They never dreamed that the horny pregnant bride they were f _ _ _ ing was the
superheroine they'd been masturbating over for years.

Diana went into labor only days after we returned.  She seemed happy enough when
they brought in a pink, very healthy looking boy, but kept looking at him
intently, as if searching for something.  She had no sooner plugged one of those
amazing breasts into the infant's mouth than she let out a whoop of joy.  "Oh,
Steve, darling, look.  Look!"  At first I didn't see what she was talking about. 
Them I did and my heart sank.  From the middle of his chest had sprung two
small, but active tentacles that were wrapped around Diana's breast.  "Isn't
that wonderful, Steve?  He can morph!  He can morph just like his fa ...  Oh,
darling, aren't those the cutest little suckers you've ever SEEN?  Our boy is
going to be sooo popular in High School with the cheerleaders.  You have no IDEA
what it's like being kissed while having your titties tickled, your clit licked,
your, er, feminine parts filled, and your bum hole rogered simultaneously!"

Admittedly I did not.  Still I was miffed.

"OK, Steve, I can understand you are unhappy not to be the father, darling, but
you'll be his DADDY.  You'll teach little Stevie to hunt and fish and play
baseball.  And I'll teach him to feel up the little girls on the school bus and
get into his teachers' panties."  I was not really mollified, wondering how I'd
feel about him fielding an infield fly with gloves on each of four upper
tentacles.  I guess my unhappiness showed.

"Don't worry, sweetheart, Steve Jr. was just an accident.  It happens to lots of
couples, the wife gets pregnant a little sooner than they were expecting.  We'll
just have to be more careful in the future."  I could have pointed out that it
was SHE who needed to be more careful, but I said nothing.

"I don't believe it!  He's so little!" Diana exclaimed.  "Look, already a little
drop!"  I looked to see what she was talking about.  Sure enough, at the tip of
Stevie's little third leg, a drop of green goo had formed.  Even as Stevie
continued to nurse from Diana's bloated tits like there was no tomorrow, Diana
reached down and took the drop and brought it to her lips.  "Oh, it's so good! 
Just like his fa...  Oh, oh,ohhhhhh!" she suddenly exclaimed.  I had heard that
women sometimes became excited when nursing, but this wasn't excitement, it was
a f _ _ _ ing come!  The air reeked of sex and I immediately knew my duty.  Even
as the aftershocks were dying away, I had my mouth onto Diana's, er, feminine
parts, sucking as vigorously as Stevie was upstairs.

Once Diana was home from the hospital she promised to be faithful from then on
and to let me make her pregnant next time, but before I got the chance she was
off on another superheroine adventure.  I was left to give little Stevie his
formula every three hours (God how that kid could bawl!), change his diapers
(God how that kid could s _ _ _!), and take care of the house.

When Diana got back - battered but beautiful - I was eager to at last f _ _ _ my
sexy wife, but it was not to be.  "Not, yet, darling, I'm still sore from that
mean old android.  Who'd have thought that a machine could f _ _ _ so well!"

Certainly not I.  His metallic phallic goo tasted worse than Thugurian
swillseed!

By the time she was fully recovered from her adventure, she had another
surprise.  "Looks like I've had another little 'accident,' darling," she
tittered.

"How can you call this an 'accident,'" I demanded

"Well, I'm sorry, but how was I to know that yummy thick goo it squirted in my
twat was Joker's GM semen?"

"Yummy?"

"Well, of course I had to taste it before I could let some out-of-control
machine fill my, er, feminine parts with who knows what.  What kind of and easy
lay do you think I am?"

I didn't know what to say, then or since.  All I know is that except for that
first time (?), I've not managed to get my prick into Diana's well-used twat. 
Nevertheless, she had made me the daddy to quite a menagerie of offspring, human
and otherwise, one accident after another.

The End

Comments, please to Homer Vargas 
vargas111@yahoo.com